Monday, October 10, 2011

10/10/11 St Louis Cardinals 12, Milwaukee Brewers 3

Miller Park, Milwaukee, WI
NLCS Game 2

It’s called #BabyMode.

After taking the first game of the NLCS, the Brewers get an unanticipated response from the Cardinals in this moderately lopsided display of offense…no surprise that the meat of it comes from the 2012 FA of the offseason, Mister Albert Pujols.

Don’t call him Alberta.

During the pregame show, Chris Rose, A.J. Pierzynski, and Eric “hair product” Karros discuss the need for adjustment Pujols needs to consider if he is to be a significant contributor to the Cardinals’ postseason success. I picture Albert in the batting cage all night (a la Tony Gwynn), trying to scientifically and systematically determine the source of his hitch and in the same manner of those cheezy 80s sports tearjerkers South Park spoofs on a regular basis, he finds his hitch, makes his adjustments, and after a hearty Bacon-Chocolate shake, buffers his resolve for Game 2. Because the Cardinals need to win tonight.

This sets the stage for “Whoppapalooza,” where the Cardinals rage into control of the game early on, with a table setting that is nothing less than a textbook opportunity for Pujols in the first inning; with 1 on and 1 out Pujols’ hitch vanishes and thus begins ”The Pujols Game,” where Albert plays 8 innings of 4-for-5, 5 RBI, 3 run scoring baseball…each of his 4 hits were for extra bases (10 total bases).

More Angry Bird madness ensues in the 7th inning, where the Cardinals touch RHP Kameron Loe for 6 back-to-back base hits, beginning with Pujols’ 1 out GRD and continuing with 5 consecutive singles for a 4-run inning before Loe gets the hook and is replaced by LaTroy Hawkins.

The funniest moment for me in the game actually started on September 7, when the Cardinals had begun their September run and the ever-pokeworthy Nyjer Morgan taunted the team boldy with these direct comments (spelling not corrected at the Editor’s preference):
Where still n 1st and I hope those crying birds injoy watching tha Crew in tha Playoffs!!! Aaaaahhhhh!!! ... Alberta couldn't see Plush if she had her gloves on!!! Wat was she thinking running afta Plush!!! She never been n tha ring!!! ...
Fast forward to the blastitudinous 7th inning, when Yadier Molina punched a single to right-center, scoring Matt Holliday and bring the Cards to a 9-2 lead over the Brewers with only 1 out and 0-for-3 David Freese on-deck. We see Molina on first, grinning from ear to ear, as he brings his fists up to his face and twists them into a “crybaby” demonstration…it’s called #BabyMode, a direct response to the media-adored Brewers’ #BeastMode celebrations.
I hope Morgan, the crying sud, “injoys” watching the Angry Birds in the WORLD SERIES. Just another reminder that some athletes are really better off at just shutting up and playing the game.

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